👨👩👧 Family RightsGaslighting as Abuse in Nigeria — Know Your Rights
Gaslighting is emotional abuse in Nigeria. Learn what it means, your legal rights, steps to take, and where to get help under Nigerian law.
Last verified: April 2026
Gaslighting is a form of psychological and emotional abuse where someone manipulates you into questioning your own memory, feelings, and reality. In Nigeria, emotional and psychological abuse — including gaslighting — is recognised as a form of domestic violence under the Violence Against Persons Prohibition (VAPP) Act 2015 and similar state laws. Understanding that gaslighting is abuse, not just a relationship problem, is the first step to protecting yourself and your family.
⚖️ Your Key Rights
- ✓You have the right to be free from psychological and emotional abuse, including gaslighting, under the Violence Against Persons Prohibition (VAPP) Act 2015 (applicable in FCT and states that have adopted it).
- ✓You have the right to seek a Protection Order from a court to stop an abuser from continuing psychological or emotional manipulation against you.
- ✓You have the right to report gaslighting and emotional abuse to the police, the National Agency for the Prohibition of Trafficking in Persons (NAPTIP), or a State Ministry of Women Affairs without fear of being dismissed.
- ✓You have the right to leave an abusive relationship — marriage or otherwise — and your consent and mental wellbeing cannot legally be disregarded or manipulated by a partner or family member.
- ✓You have the right to access free or subsidised legal aid through the Legal Aid Council of Nigeria if you cannot afford a private lawyer when seeking protection from an abusive situation.
- ✓Children in Nigeria also have the right to be protected from psychological abuse and manipulation under the Child Rights Act 2003, which many states have adopted.
- ✓You have the right to seek civil remedies, including damages, against a person who has caused you provable psychological harm through sustained emotional abuse.
📋 Common Situations Explained
A Spouse Denies Abusive Incidents Ever Happened
A common form of gaslighting in marriages is when a partner repeatedly denies saying or doing harmful things, making you feel like you imagined it. Under the VAPP Act, psychological abuse — including behaviour designed to make a victim doubt their own mind — is a criminal offence. You can report this to the police or a domestic violence shelter and apply for a Protection Order.
A Partner Tells You That You Are 'Too Sensitive' or 'Mentally Unstable'
When an abuser constantly labels you as mentally ill, overly emotional, or unstable to deflect from their behaviour, this is gaslighting. Nigerian law under the VAPP Act recognises this as emotional abuse. Documenting these incidents and seeking a counsellor's assessment can help build a case if you decide to take legal action.
In-Laws or Family Members Manipulating a Spouse
In some Nigerian families, in-laws or extended family members gaslight a spouse — particularly women — telling them their experiences of mistreatment are not real or that they are ungrateful. This behaviour can form part of a pattern of domestic violence. The VAPP Act covers abuse committed not only by spouses but also by persons in a domestic relationship, which can include family members in a shared home.
A Parent Gaslighting a Child
When a parent routinely dismisses, distorts, or denies a child's experiences and feelings to control them, it constitutes psychological abuse under the Child Rights Act 2003. States that have adopted the Act empower social welfare officers and the courts to intervene and protect the child, including removing them from a harmful environment if necessary.
Gaslighting in a Relationship That Is Not a Formal Marriage
Gaslighting can happen in dating relationships, cohabitation, and customary unions, not only in statutory marriages. The VAPP Act covers persons in 'domestic relationships,' which includes people who live together or are in an intimate relationship. Victims in these arrangements have the same right to report abuse and seek Protection Orders as those in formal marriages.
🚀 What To Do
- 1Start keeping a private record of incidents — write down dates, what was said or done, and how it made you feel. Save screenshots, voice notes, or messages where possible, as this evidence can support your case.
- 2Reach out to a trusted person — a friend, counsellor, doctor, or religious leader — who can provide an outside perspective and confirm your experiences, which also helps counter the abuser's narrative.
- 3Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline in Nigeria or your State Ministry of Women Affairs and Social Development to report the abuse and get guidance on the next steps available in your state.
- 4Visit the nearest police station or a Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team (DSVRT) — available in Lagos and some other states — to make a formal report and request a Protection Order if you feel unsafe.
- 5Apply for a court Protection Order through a Magistrate Court or High Court under the VAPP Act or your state's domestic violence law, which can legally prohibit the abuser from contacting or approaching you.
- 6Seek support from a registered counsellor or psychologist, as documented professional assessments of your psychological state can be important evidence if your case proceeds to court, and therapy is vital for your recovery.
👨⚖️ When to Get a Lawyer
You should contact a lawyer immediately if you intend to file criminal charges, seek a divorce or separation, apply for a Protection Order, or if the gaslighting is happening alongside physical violence or threats. The Legal Aid Council of Nigeria can provide free assistance if you cannot afford private legal fees.
🔗 Official Resources
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